Tag Archives: iPhone

Jon Stewart vs Twitter

Twitter is the
Best for me
I get my news
One two three.

I don’t have to wait
For evenings at seven
Or six or ten
Or, God forbid, eleven.

I pick up my iPhone
It’s simple you see
No straining with newsprint
No waste, no fees.

No cost whatsoever
To get my news fast
Why wait for a reporter
To send out a blast.

I want to know now.
No patience have I
To read lengthy stories
To strain my old eyes.

I pick up my phone
I click on my app
Getting my headlines
Is really a snap.

I get quite enough
Of news that I need
I don’t have to wade through
Dribble you see.

I don’t want opinion
Or spin on a story
Give me the facts
Not allegory.

I’ll take my news
Dumbed down with ease
I just want your tweet
140 words please.

After the day’s done
I’m caught up on news
I’ll search my recordings
Jon Stewart I’ll choose.

To give me the lowdown
On politics and prose
His wit and his wisdom
His genius, who knows?

He’s right on the mark
He cuts through the chase
Ok, I’ll admit it
He has a cute face.

He wrinkles and scrunches
His cute little nose
But wisdom comes through
Clear down to his toes.

Twitter by day
Is as good as it gets
For full coverage the Daily Show
Is truly the best.

Sex and Words with Friends

 I could sense him getting close. His sweet breath felt warm against my neck. His strong hand, tenderly caressing my shoulder, was comforting, and exciting. Buzz, buzz. He was pulling me closer. Gently, he turned my face towards his. He gazed deeply into my eyes. Buzz, buzz. I turned away. He drew me closer. As our lips touched I could no longer ignore my feelings, my desire. I had to follow my heart. “Just one more word,” I pleaded.

“Put down that damn game.” He sounded angry.

“You’re right. I’m sorry.” I said. Pushing my iPhone away, I reached my arms around his neck. Smiling, I moved in closer. Buzz, Buzz. What more does he expect? I’ve got it silenced. I resisted checking the screen. I needed to decide which is more important, my husband, or this damn game? I had to get my priorities in order. Buzz, Buzz.

“Why don’t you go upstairs, I’ll be up in a minute,” I said with a smile and a wink.

“Fine,” he responded. Fine is my line when I’m pissed off. I wonder if fine means the same to him.

Yes! I have a seven letter word! Just one more, I decided, and then I’ll go upstairs.

Two hours later I finally made it up to bed wondering, is this going on everywhere?

I’ve got to stop this. Tomorrow! Am I alone or are others obsessed?